According to “sources,” (whoever that may be) Carson Palmer likes throwing to Terrell Owens, and a signing with the Bengals may or may not be imminent…

Chad Ochocinco has commented on twitter that T.O. is definitely coming to Cincy and that T.O. is Batman while Chad is Robin.  Ambiguously Gay Duo references aside, this is an extremely interesting, befuddling, perplexing, and intriguing development for the Bengals.

Even Ace and Gary are confused about the T.O. situation.

Several months ago in free agency, the Bengals had a chance to sign T.O. and they opted out for Antonio Bryant instead. A move that I applauded.  I even wrote a Dr. Seussian blog about my desire not to have T.O.  I did not want a much older receiver with a history of being a malcontent on the Bengals roster.

But now… if we can have T.O., Bryant, and Chad on the same roster, what does that mean?

Okay, I won’t lie.

My initial reaction to the story was (slow motion effects now, like at the end of Die Hard when Hans Gruber falls from the building):
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

One minute later, however, I was thinking:

This is intriguing.

Okay, let’s take a look at all the potential questions that this story brings up:

1. Is this signing really possible? Don’t the Bengals have enough receivers already?

The answer is yes to both questions. Never question the Bengals on their ability and desire to sign anyone or anything to their roster. Period. End of story. If Osama bin Laden could run a 4.2 forty, we’d give him a 4-year deal. If a cheese Danish could bench 225 lb. 42 times, they’d put him at right tackle. Oh wait, never mind, we already have Andre Smith. Woops.

The Bengals also have plenty of competent, athletic receivers to work with in training camp. After Chad and Bryant, they have Jordan Shipley, Andre Caldwell, Quan Cosby, Matt Jones, Jerome Simpson, and Dez “I’m not a county” Briscoe. All of these dudes have potential to contribute to the Bengals. We drafted Shipley and Briscoe in April. And this was after we had signed the former coke addict M. Jones as a free agent.

The Bengals certainly didn’t seem like they were hoping for T.O. to be available, especially after they told him no the first time.

If we sign T.O., that’s going to put a young receiver on the street that could help the Bengals down the road. But then on the flip side, you would like to see your team try to go for broke and win now. I don’t know, I’m conflicted.

2. T.O. had a “bad” season last year. Why would the Bengals want him?

Well… everyone wants to announce that T.O. is finished because he had only 829 yards receiving and 5 TDs.

Here are a few problems with that: 1. Trent Edwards and Ryan Fitzpatrick. I don’t need to say anything more. 2. It was the effin’ Bills, people. Once again, no need for further explaination. 3. T.O. still average 15 yards per catch… that’s pretty darn good.

Imagine if he had a competent QB, like Carson Palmer. T.O. is still in shape, and Palmer himself, according to an unnamed source (I hate that), said he liked throwing to T.O.

3. Won’t T.O. + Chad = too much drama? Won’t T.O. be a distraction and/or cancer in the locker room?

This one will be interesting to find out, and T.O. detractors and Bengal haters (who are everywhere and anywhere) will automatically say that T.O. will be a huge distraction and the Bengals will implode because they are the Bengals and the Bengals haven’t had back-to-back winning seasons in forever and they suck and we hate the Bengals because they suck.

Woo.

Sorry.

Okay, everyone loves to cite history to make predictons for the upcoming season, and there is a mountain of history for both T.O. and the Bengals.

But…

T.O. was on a losing team last year and yet he did not create any drama at all in Buffalo.

T.O. and Chad are peers. They are friends. Chad wanted T.O. to be on the team. Chad respects T.O. and T.O. respects Chad. Chad has already said he’d be “Robin,” already placating T.O.’s ego. I think it’s entirely possible for T.O. and Chad to coexist peacefully and happily in Cincy. Could there be drama? Of course. But I think the leaders of the team won’t let T.O. change the dynamics of the club.  The culture of the Bengals has changed to a more positive, productive environment, and I think this team can handle any possible drama generated by T.O.

4. Wait, what about Antonio Bryant? Does it mean the Bengals are worried about his knee injury?

Okay, this one is a tough one for me.

What happens to a guy that we signed for $28 million? Does he just become our third receiver? Will he be happy? Will there be enough balls thrown around to please all three parties?

This also could be an indication that Bryant’s knee might not be as healthy as the Bengals want it to be. I have yet to read any updates on Bryant’s condition, so any thoughts on this matter are pure speculation.

With Chad, Bryant, and T.O. on the roster… those are three Pro Bowlers there, and three big egos. I can’t say much about Byrant himself, but any professional football player, especially a receiver, has to have some ego.

I think what would have to happen is more three-receiver sets, and possibly a rotation of Chad, T.O., and Bryant.

First, let’s talk about the three-receiver sets…

OMG! They would be so awesome! They would be the bomb-diggity! [Squeals like a teenage girl]

Sorry, but a three-receiver set with Chad, T.O., and Bryant? C’mon. That’s almost not fair. If you try to double team just one of them, Carson will just find someone else open. I can see the Bengals just destroying people with this option. Hell, the Bengals could go into a 3-wide set on first down, the defense would expect a bomb or something, and then we’d give it to Cedric Benson and he’d get 15 yards. Oh man… [wipes the drool off chin]… I like that…

And then there could be a rotaton. Which could be fraught with obvious ego problems, but the coaches would need to level with everyone and tell them up front about  it,  and I think they it COULD work (not saying it will).

Still… the possibilities would be unbelievable.

5. Would this make the Bengals a Super Bowl contender?

Hell, I thought the Bengals were a Super Bowl contender beforehand, but with a healthy T.O. with Chad and Bryant…

HELL YES, THIS WOULD PUT THE BENGALS OVER THE TOP, EASILY.

I definitely have flashes in my head of a record-breaking season for the Bengals offense, through the air and on the ground. Chad, Bryant, and T.O., all having 1,000 yards receiving, double digit TDs each…

That is the dream scenario, of course.

As I mentioned before, my initial reaction to a T.O. signing, past or present, has been a visceral no.

Now?

Why the hell not?

You can email David Jacob with any questions, comments, criticisms, or spicy chili recipes at djacob@gearupforsports.com, and/or follow him at http://twitter.com/HoldenCarraway, OR join his group on facebook.